Shoes

Shoes are a funny thing…because they are so insignificant, but also incredibly significant. Shoes protect our feet when we walk, they give us support, and comfort. Shoes are stylish, but I have also seen some pretty unfortunate looking ones.

Some of my fondest memories involve shoes- like the nights in college when I lost one at the bar and ran home barefoot. Or when I would fall in my high heels because I insisted on wearing them out on the town even in a blizzard.

One of my favorite childhood memories has to do with shoes…and my mom. I loved shoes growing up, like could not get enough of them. One late afternoon, my mom treated me and took me shopping for several pairs of shoes. When we left the store, it was a monsoon outside. We couldn’t find our car- we were drenched, blinded by the pellets of raindrops, and searched the sea of cars in the parking lot. When we finally found our car, we were soaking wet. We got into our seats, wiped our eyes with whatever we could find that was dry, look at each other, and just laughed.

We talk about this moment quite often. It probably doesn’t seem like a good or noteworthy story to others, but to us, it was a special experience that we shared. Nothing dramatic happened, nothing crazy; just some rain, some shoes, and a mother and daughter spending time together.

When I found out I was having a daughter, I was elated. I pictured shopping sprees, getting caught in the rain, and sharing the same unbreakable relationship I have with my mother.

Buying a child’s first pair of shoes is always such an exciting time- it means they are on the move- standing, walking, or maybe they are almost there.

But for me, for us, the joy of purchasing shoes is so different than from what others experience, or what I envisioned for my daughter.

Today, Hailey got her first pair of AFO’s, leg braces.  I know they will help her, but I can’t help feeling mixed emotions as I “brace” myself (pun intended) for our shoe shopping experience.

The shoes I always pictured her running in, have evolved into practicality. Shoes will be purchased that will support her, and fit her tiny feet that have now been coated with a brace to support her legs.

Flashbacks of shoe shopping with my son, as he toddled around, picking out the cutest sneakers brings a smile to my face, but also a ping of grief in my heart as I know the experience finding shoes for Hailey will be vastly different.

Shoes are merely a man-made object that was created to make it easier, safer, and more fashionable for individuals. At the end of the day, Hailey has an even larger safety net doing all of those things for her. So we may be buying shoes for her that I didn’t picture her in, but I know that whatever pair we choose, it will be another STEP forward as Hailey moves at her very own pace.